In your dream you bought a disassembled bike. I couldn't recall whether the bike was real, or only in our imagination. Somehow it stuck with me throughout the morning and started festering. I thought it meant something. Bikes can take you so many places. But having to buy something and put it together might be a heartache. As if you are putting your life together that is currently in pieces. I wonder who has taken your pieces. Sometimes people don't return the pieces they take, but that's a risk we're always willing to take. May your new bike bring you something beautiful. Take you to someplace new; Even if only figuratively.
“Take the first step in faith, you don't have to see the whole staircase, just take the first step.” ― Martin Luther King Jr.
Is something changing? Or will this madness continue for infinity? I'm finding moments of peace in chaos. Truly today was something different. Possibly useful somethings in a mindless way of inaction. I'm finding my internal workings are a little deeper. As I dig - I twist and I turn. I find dead ends that lead to nothing but empty space. My mind aches from the straining. I want to stop but something is telling me that there is something more to what I'm doing. There is something more for everyone.
“You become more divine as you become more creative. All the religions of the world have said God is the creator. I don’t know whether he is the creator or not, but one thing I know: the more creative you become, the more godly you become. When your creativity comes to a climax, when your whole life becomes creative, you live in God. So he must be the creator because people who have been creative have been closest to him. Love what you do. Be meditative while you are doing it – whatsoever it is” ―Osho
Eating up the problems makes me feel full. I consume them like corporations feeding on greed. Lovely is something of what we make. Though it might not always be magical, lovely is different from here. Sleepy I become numb.
I'm so sick and it hurts to my bones. I want to scream and escape but I'm stuck to this spot by super glue. I can't seem to help myself today. It's so frustrating. So humiliating. At least I'm sober, So I can suck it all in.